Good Morning Prayer Warriors,
Sometimes it's hard to find the encouraging words I know everyone is looking for when they check up on Jesse's progress. She is getting better...physically. We both had a bad night mentally. It must be hard for most of the readers to visualize a 10 x 20 room being all you have seen for over a month. Or having a 4 month baby five feet away crying at the top of its lungs for an hour then starting up again a few hours later. I actually laid there and got mad about it. I am so sorry for my weakness. When Brady finally went to sleep I could hear his Mom crying. I could feel her frustration and helplessness. I knew what she was going through. I told her (and God) I was sorry. To have a new born baby and already going through this "Hell" has to be tough. Jesse didn't much sleep either. Her antibiotics make her go to the bathroom almost every hour. She told me again last night that she was sorry. Those words cut me deep. For her to be concerned about what I am going through really touched me. I watched as they changed her bandage on her chest (they were training me). I noticed, as they peeled the 3 x 5 adhesive bandage off, that her skin was almost raw in the shape of her bandage. They have replaced the bandage at least five times and put it back in the same exact spot. Hello! Can't they see how raw her skin is? I asked if we could put the new one on in a different angle to give some of her skin a break. The answer...that's a good idea (God gave me grace again. I wanted to strap one on each of the nurses and see how they liked it).
Well for the good news. Jesse's ANC is at 132. She hasn't had a fever in two days (that spiked to a high number) and her diarrhea has almost completely stopped and become a soft normal movement (sorry about the details here). Her body is making Platelets. She is up to 60,000. Last week this time she was at 6,000. Her White blood cells are up to 600. They have been at 500 for a while. Her Neutrophils are down causing the low ANC. So physically she is doing better.
They are scheduling her for a bone marrow puncture and a spinal tap next Monday. At least she gets some sleep then.
As I listened to KLOVE (105.5 fm) last night and read everyones blogs to Jesse the tears rolled down my face. There is so much prayers and support and kind words that you guys write. Words can't express how much it means to have people take the time to write Jesse and the hope it gives us all. Reading the scriptures that some add give me the right words to say to Jesse when she gets down. God is good and in control. We can't understand the "why" at this time. That will be the first question when I bump into the "Big Guy" in heaven.
KLOVE is a great radio station for those of you looking for a radio station that has encouraging music and words. It has helped me through some tough moments.
God bless you all today. Count your blessings today. There is so much to be grateful for.